Giving Thanks When There’s Nothing to Give Thanks For
At this time of year, many of us will get together with friends and family to fellowship over a roasted (or fried) turkey. At Thanksgiving, it is almost impossible to escape being asked to enumerate the things we are thankful for. What is never mentioned but always seems to be implied, though, is that the things listed should always be good and happy. We’ll quote 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “In every thing give thanks,” and then commence to list out all the people, progress, attitudes, or material/mental/emotional things that have improved their lives (or at least made them less miserable), expecting others to do the same. But the reality for many of us is that it’s difficult to find the good right now.
As I write this, there are people in my family struggling with health issues or financial crises. Friends have lost loved ones or fear they could very soon lose them. I’m dealing with a growing number of college students that are distraught and on the edge because of pressures from within and without, many of them searching for an answer and about to give up. The news is a never-ending cycle of “what’s wrong today”. I won’t lie – it’s gut-wrenching, knowing the hardships and heartaches people are dealing with. But I was reminded the other day at a prayer meeting that “in every thing” doesn’t mean just the good things – it means the good, the bad, the boring, and the in between.
This question was posed to us: How do we, as believers in Christ, find a way to give thanks when things are going wrong? When a loved one is passing away, you’re losing your job, you’re feeling overwhelmed and underprepared for life, or, as one woman shared during the meeting, you are literally (as well as figuratively) stuck in the middle of the desert a long ways from help, how do you be thankful?
I think the first step for me in answering this question was realizing that I don’t have to feel happy or thankful to give thanks. We all go through the wringer (in fact, we’re promised we would – Matt. 5:10-12; John 16:33; 1 Peter 4:12-14) and we shouldn’t have to pretend everything is alright when we do. David, the man after God’s own heart, struggled quite a bit and often openly with his problems (read through Psalms and tell me the man wasn’t struggling with bouts of depression, anger, or fear in the middle of all his triumphs). Even Jesus experienced loss and grieved openly when Lazarus died (John 11:35). It’s got to be okay for us to not be okay with a situation, to be sad, to be upset, to have emotions and let others see them. We’re human, and the Lord gave us these feelings to respond to our environment, and put other people around so they could see our feelings and (hopefully) help us cope. Not to say we break down and cry every time someone asks us what’s going on. But I think, as a community, believers should feel comfortable enough around each other to say, honestly, “Hey, you know, everything’s not fine today. I am going through something.” And we are called on, as believers, to “bear one another’s burdens” (Gal. 6:2), and we can’t do that without sharing our burdens with each other. So I think the first step to giving thanks is recognizing that giving thanks is not contingent on how I feel in the moment. When you thank someone (or something), you’re acknowledging what they have done for you – good feelings don’t have to be involved. God is not expecting me to always be in a good situation or even great frame of mind in order to give Him thanks. “In every thing” should include when I’m like David and “every night I flood my bed with tears; I drench my couch with my weeping,” I still find a way to give thanks (Psalm 6:6). But how?
I think what was great about David was that, even when he was at rock bottom, he always reminded himself of who God is and clung to the promise in God of hope, salvation and overcoming his present situation, even when the process of holding on was dragging on longer than the prospect of relief from his trial. In Psalm 42, he writes, “Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation (or ‘health of my countenance’ in KJV, which I like) and my God” (vs. 11). Even in the middle of his anguish, he declares to himself that he will trust in God. He knew God does not abandon His children and that He brings salvation to and upholds the spiritual (and emotional, mental, physical) integrity of those who wait on Him. David trusts, time and again throughout Psalms, in the immutable character of God and, while he couldn’t always rejoice in his situation, he could rejoice in who God is. And I think that’s what we’re meant to do, through the help of the Holy Spirit, who reminds us of who God is and who we are in Him. And then, with the Spirit’s help through prayer and being in God’s Word and fellowshipping with other believers, we can find our way to being thankful that this situation has made us desperate for Him, that He will draw good it (whether we get to see it or not), and He will ultimately get the glory.
And sometimes our comfort, our desires, our sensitive human hearts take a back seat to His will, timing, the purpose He has, and the glory He will get out of it.
Not to say that God doesn’t care that we’re hurting in a situation. But He does allow certain things to happen to us in order to get a better glory out of it (like the pain Mary and Martha had to go through when their brother Lazarus died in order for God to get glory from Jesus raising him from the dead). That’s not an easy thing to swallow about God, but that’s where trusting that He is good and that He has our good at heart is so important. We may have to suffer heartache, loss, frustration and feeling overwhelmed so that He can get glory through our testimony of clinging to Him despite everything. But we can bear these trials because we know that our God isn’t a mean God, He isn’t trying to trick us or get one over on us, and that nothing He does is arbitrary or out of spite. He is good, His purposes are good, and we can trust that, in the end, whether we’re around to see it and whether it looks like what we hoped for or not, the end will be good, too.
And that’s something to be thankful for.
Blog photo by whoislimos
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