Joseph: A Case Study of a Godly Man
I have been reading through the Gospels recently to get a better understanding of who Jesus is and what he really had to say about life and the believer’s walk. Something I noticed was the disparaging comments that people had to say about his “origin” story. When Jesus is in the synagogues teaching, you hear a lot of people marveling and saying, “Isn’t that Mary’s son?” or “Isn’t that the carpenter?” (Matthew 13:54-57, Mark 6:1-4). If this doesn’t sound so strange, keep in mind that it was more culturally appropriate at the time to refer to a child in relation to the father, not the mother. A more respectful question would have been, “Isn’t that Joseph’s son?” But, because there was a question mark surrounding who Jesus’ father was, people threw shade and attributed Christ to his mother.
This got me to thinking – just what was Joseph like? A lot of sermons are preached on Mary, there’s a lot of reference made to Mary in the Gospels because she outlives her husband and is cared for by the beloved apostle, John, after Jesus’ death and resurrection. She the inspiration to a lot of women on how to keep a cool head and a faithful heart in the middle of a trying circumstance. There’s a lot about Mary. But honestly, I don’t recall hearing an in-depth sermon on Joseph. He always seems to be a side note in the story, a figure that exists but has no form outside of “Jesus’ earthly father”. I got curious as to what sort of man Joseph was. God chose Mary to bare his Son because she was humble, obedient, and a woman of great faith – someone up to the task of raising the Son of God. But in doing so, he also chose Joseph to raise his Son (remember, they were betrothed when the angel told Mary about Jesus).
Biblically, there’s really not much written about him. However, from what I found, I realized that Joseph was just the sort of believer I aspire to be, and hope to find in a future husband. Here are three things I learned about Joseph that I think made for a godly man:
- He was compassionate, not dramatic
In our first introduction to Joseph in Matthew 1, he has just heard that the woman he’s marrying is pregnant. We all know how big a deal this was at the time, but considering how big a deal he could have made it, his reaction is surprisingly reserved. Matthew 1:19 says, “And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly.” In what must have been a stressful and even humiliating time, Joseph still thought of how things would be for her. Her being pregnant was public knowledge at this point, but his response to it would make all the difference. He knew that the child wasn’t his, but he also knew how people would treat her if he publically ridiculed her, and instead chose to be compassionate by not dragging her name through the mud. And clearly he wasn’t a man who craved drama (and yes, there are men like that). Not only was he not going to make a public spectacle of her pregnancy, but he was not going to make a circus out of their divorce, resolving “to divorce her quietly.” He wasn’t going to get the whole town involved, he was just going to deal directly with Mary (and probably her family) and be done with it. I think it is a great mark of a godly man when he shows compassion and grace when it doesn’t seem to be deserved. He deals calmly with a situation, not overdramatizing it but taking it seriously and only involving those who are relevant to the issue.
- He was quick to think, slow to act
Matthew 1:20 starts with, “But as he considered these things.” He thought about it. How many times have you seen a guy charge into a situation without thinking things through? Men seem to be hardwired to fix things, which is good in many cases, but when you have a situation requiring more delicate handling, it helps when someone is going to take time to think of their response or action rather than just charging in blindly. And I think, in an age where everything happens fast and changes rapidly, where our thoughts can be put down instantly in 140 characters or less and we can get immediate approval from others just by acting impulsively, it gets harder and harder to take a moment to think things through before acting on them. But I love that, while he had a pretty decent plan in place for responding to Mary’s pregnancy, Joseph still took time to think about it. And, based on what happened next, he was probably doing some prayer, too, asking God for guidance. Which is interesting, because he had a perfectly good plan in place that anyone would have commended him for. But he still waited for God for confirmation and guidance. How do I know? Well…
- He was in tune with God
“…Behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost.” (Matt. 1:20). Angels generally make appearances to men and women who are following after God and open to his direction. The angel calms his anxieties and confirms to him that Mary is an honorable, indeed a very blessed girl, and that Joseph shouldn’t be afraid of what others might think in staying with her. And Joseph obeys – “Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife. (Matt. 1:24). This isn’t the last time God sends an angel to Joseph – in Matt. 2:13, he is warned of Herod’s design to kill Jesus, and immediately takes his family down to Egypt. In verses 19 and 22 of the same chapter, he is visited again with different instructions. Again, he doesn’t question, he just obeys God’s instructions. This shows a faith and trust in God that I really admire. Here is a man truly relying on God for the safety of himself and his family. He’s not leaning on his own fears or knowledge about the situation, but is sensitive to God’s guidance and direction.
I’m sure Joseph had his moments of doubt, of fear, of wondering if he was up to the task of raising the Son of God (probably wondered a few times if Jesus really was the Son of God). But just from these few verses, I see a man with a careful mind and compassionate heart, prudent and undramatic, who was faithfully obedient to God in times of stress and peace. Someone who would put God and his family over what others thought of him. I don’t think Mary could have asked for a better man to be beside her.